The Commandants of each military branch were gathered around a campfire.
"I'm the toughest man here!" said the Commandant of the Army "I once fought an entire enemy battalion armed only with a bayonet!"
"No, I'm the toughest!" said the Commandant of the Navy "I once sunk an enemy fleet from a lifeboat!"
"Hell, I'm the toughest!" said the Commandant of the Air Force "I once took out an enemy squadron in a crop duster!"
The Commandant of the Marine Corps just sat there, quietly stoking the campfire with his dick.