Insults

“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” — Forrest Tucker

 

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?” — Mark Twain

 

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” — Mae West

 

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” — Oscar Wilde

 

“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts… for support rather than illumination.” — Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

 

“He has Van Gogh's ear for music.” — Billy Wilder

 

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” — Winston Churchill

 

Others:

A guy with your IQ should have a low voice too!

 

I've only got one nerve left, and you're getting on it.

 

I've seen people like you, but I had to pay admission!

 

Look, don't go to a mind reader; go to a palmist; I know you've got a palm.

 

Make a mental note . . . oh, I see you're out of paper!

 

Make somebody happy. Mind your own business.

 

Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?

 

Are you brain-dead?

 

Are your parents siblings?

 

As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?

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