A year or two ago, I met a man online whom I admire and respect
very much, Anthony Goddard. We have never met in person and
communicate via email and telephone.
He retired as a Gunnery Sergeant after 20 years in the Corps and
now lives in Maryland. He was awarded a Bronze Star with "V"
for Valor, 3 Purple Hearts and too many other medals and ribbons
to mention here (you oughta see his shadow box). He was also a
Senior DI at Parris Island.
We've swapped a few stories about the "Crotch" and the following
is my favorite.
Mike Benfield
Charlotte, NC
USMC 1959 – 1963
SDI Story, Parris Island, SC
It was a rainy day and one of my dumb recruits was a real screw-
up. He never did anything right and he was always too slow, not
to mention he was overweight. I almost sent him to the fat body
platoon but decided I wanted to have fun with him instead. I
took him out in the rain this day to my Rose Garden (sand pit).
I PT'd the crap out of him for about an hour straight.
Then the sun came out and it got hot and humid. I thought this
would be great because the sand fleas would be out in full-
force. I told him to keep "mountain climbing" and I would be
right back. I went in to put on some Skin So Soft (bath oil) to
keep the sand fleas off me. That stuff worked better than any
bug juice.
I got back and he was flat on his face. Of course, I screamed
at him to get up. He said "Sir, the recruit can't, sir". Well,
I took my right foot and planted it right up his rear end. I
then yelled, "Get up, you fat walrus piece of crap before I
recycle you."
He then got up and stood at attention the best he could. I got
right in his face and told him to stand at attention for a while
because it was about lunch time for my sand fleas and he was
their lunch. I also told him that if he killed one of my sand
fleas, I would PT him for a week from sunup to sundown and then
take him in the broom closet and kick his fat a–.
This fat lame recruit was pitiful. He stood there for about an
hour while the rest of the platoon went to chow. He was making
the most ridiculous looking faces I have ever seen because the
sand fleas were eating him alive. I told him that just maybe
the sand fleas would eat some of the fat off his walrus a– and
help him out.
After about an hour of this, he started to cry. Well, this was
all I needed to see. I asked him just what his MOS was. He
didn't know. Well, I said "You mean to tell me you're going in
the infantry, you fat, disgusting walrus piece of crap?" I told
him that I for one didn't let crybabies in my beloved Marine
Corps and if he didn't stop crying, I would send his fat a–
home to his mama.
I said, "What's going to happen when you go overseas to Iraq or
someplace like that and you get shot at or even hit? Are you
going to cry for your mommy"? He was yelling "Sir, no sir" the
entire time. I told him if he didn't get his s–t together that
what just went on today would be a picnic compared to what I was
going to do to him.
I told him that I was not going to send his fat a– home. I was
going to make a Marine out of him even if it killed him in the
process and I was not kidding with him. I told him that I could
do anything I wanted with him, so he had better straighten up.
He said, "Sir, yes sir, the recruit will be a Marine, sir." I
then told him to go get a shower and I was putting him on a diet
and get out of my face.
Believe it or not, the fat a– dropped about 50 pds and earned a
PFC stripe out of boot camp! This was just one day in the life
of my DI days. Gotta love it. Semper Fi.
Goddard is a fake phoney POS. Look his name up on The “This Ain’t Hell” site. He goes by Andy or Anthony. He served about 6 months and was drummed out of the Corps before he completed boot camp.
What a POS what-a-be. Semper Fi to the Marine Above that reported his bullcrap. Seems stories such as this never stop. As we said in the CORPS, talk is cheap. USMC 1964-1968, 1976-1978. 1966-1967 VietNam. Proud to serve and prouder to have fellow brothers that report these frauds. ??????
Semper Fi to you too Mike! Yeah I hate this poser shit. Can’t stand those bastards. Especially the shitheads who wash out of boot camp and then claim all that rank and all those ribbons that real Marines and the brass ball Heros earn by giving life and limb. I won’t tolerate it and try and report it where I can.
That’s for the heads up, Mile Kunkel. Never heard of that site, but I will be checking it out now! You are right, he is a POS. Maybe he was the dumb recruit in his fake story! P.S. I forward all of the Sgt. Grit stories to my son who has been in the USMC since Labor Day of last year. Semper Fi from this MoM!
Semper Fi Patricia and to your devil dog son!! Yes, the This Ain’t Hell site is awesome. They report a lot of good news but they also do a great job of busting phonies. Sign up to get the emails, they come about 4 times a week and at least 2 of the emails call out a faker. It’s amazing. Here your son earned the title United States Marine, and some coward, piece of shit turd will try to steal that honor. It sickens me.
In the fake’s story he claims to ask “his”recruit what his MOS was. Well if Goddard had ever finished boot camp himself he would have known that you don’t learn your MOS until the final days of boot camp.
I had my MOS guaranteed before I even went to boot camp back in ’81. Maybe they don’t do that anymore, I don’t know, I just know they did back then. I just checked out the “This Ain’t Hell” website, looks pretty cool, I don’t rate to join even though I was with the first unit to go into Beirut, the 32nd MAU, since the 50’s. Apparently, we didn’t rate A CAR. Even though if you ask the Marines at posts 69, and 70 if they saw any action, I’m pretty sure it seemed like action to them and to those of us who walked guard duty and had rounds fired at us at the port of Beirut. I guess in the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t matter anymore after all these years….Semper Fi Marines
Jerry, yes I sort of fired off due to being so pissed off on this phoney shit. I was in from 81 to 85 and guys who got a guaranteed contract knew their MOS but those who went open contract did not. I sign up to go into combat engineers or tanks and my recruiter talked my stupid ass into open contract. On the day before graduation the DIs told us our MOS and I was told 0300. I asked permission to speak and told the SDI that my recruiter told me I was supposed to get combat engineers or tanks and he told me to shut the fuck up. lol. Anyway, you can sign up to get the This Ain’t Hell e-mails. I did two tours in Beirut but don’t rate a CAR, but that does not matter. You can still get the emails. They nail a lot of phonies. That’s how I found out about this Andy Goddard goof.
Thanks for the info on that website, Mike. You might have had a good time with the combat engineers. I knew alot of those guys as I was an electrician, all of them alot of fun! Them and the bulk fuel guys! Always had great times with those guys. I was with MSSG-32 in Beirut. In the AO 3 times during that Med Cruise. The first time to evacuate the civilians in harm’s way in Jounieh, Lebanon. Then securing the port of Beirut and overseeing the PLO pullout. Then the third time to secure the Beirut Airport.
Jerry, I was with Lima 3/8 and we relived 2/8 down at the Shit river by the airport runway. We stayed there for about a month or so then they moved us up to the American University where we stayed until 1/8 relieved us. We would only come down to the MAU headquarters to get showers until the engineers built us working showers and fixed the shitters up at the university. We also came down on resupply work parties but that’s about it. We always thought that security at the headquarters was a tad laxed. On my second tour we were on the Corneish by the American Embasy for the entire time. Semper Fi my brother! Mike
I thought that story sounded funny when he asked what his MOS was. Hell we didn’t get our MOS’s until the last day of boot camp and even then we didn’t know what it was. The 0311’s did I think. Sgt Sisson July 1968- July 1971 Vietnam April 1969 – Oct 1970 12th Marines and 11Th Marines
I stand corrected. Turns out Goddard did graduate from boot camp but got out after about 18 months as a PFC. But he’s not the Gunny he claims to be nor did he earn any of the medals he claims and he is also not a Beirut veteran. I am no expert on photo-shopping pictures but his DI photos at the Parris Island main gate look really good, although I don’t ever recall seeing any Marine, let alone a DI with a goatee 5 o’clock shadow like his while in uniform. One of his DI photos taken in cammie fatigues is taken in a backyard by the CSX railroad tracks in Havre De Grace, Maryland. I know the exact spot where the photo was taken as I am familiar with that area. Who the hell dresses up in DI gear and takes a photo at home? None of these goofball phonies realize that when they post all theses photos of them in full regalia at home in their bedrooms or computer rooms, but can’t produce just one photo of all the places they claimed to have stormed, it makes us all suspicious.
The other bullshit line in the story: do any of you Marines EVER recall a recruit that was as far out of shape as Goddard claims who could be PT’d in the rose garden for an hour in that Parris Island heat and humidity and not pass out? I don’t know ANY human in shape who could last an hour much less a food blister fat body recruit.
No way! That heat and humidity was oppressive! Pretty sure as an old man today I couldn’t do it. Lol. And the stench of that damn swamp gas. Never forget that smell! But the thing that motivated me the most was knowing guys like Chesty Puller and John Basilone made it through and I was NOT gonna let those legends down. Hallowed ground to be sure my brother!
There is a lot of crap out there i read one guy went to court and won he was wearing medal that he didn’t earn and the judge said it ok
As I remember it, the word “crotch” was used when I was in the Corps back in 69-72. I didn’t know that it was still being used in 80’s. Somebody correct me if I am right or wrong. OooRah and Semper Fi!
AJ, I was in the Corps from 81 to 85 and we used the term “crotch” too, but I recall the primary slang term as being “the suck”, as in “fuck the suck” and some dumbass added eat the apple not the corps. Really stupid shit huh? LOL. But, the term crotch did make it into the 80’s. I wonder what derogatory term is used today? Mike
I agree with the views of the Marines who berate those who basically throw in the towel, I for one will not go around pretending to be something I am not. I did attend a civil war reenactment and talked to some of the Marines who were there and they asked me to join I at first declined and told them about my own screw up. their senior NCO who was a SEARGENT MAJOR told me at least you are honest about what you did and since my discharge was still honorable, he told me he would not mind my joining as he would rather have some one who at least made an effort rather than some idiotic moron who would own not own up to his stupidity!. of course I had to go back to basic again after taking his offer! and it was worth it! boot camp was still pretty demanding and the Corps of that time is a bit different but you still have to be squared away and right of the line!. I wear my uniform with pride and humbleness because I represent President Lincoln and those men who gave their lives for something that comes at a great price, freedom and liberty!. semper fi do or die!