Hey, SgtGRIT readers and contributors! I need some help. You and SgtGRIT helped me out before with my first book. Now I’m looking for more funny, true boot camp stories that you either experienced yourself or witnessed. I would love to hear from some Women Marines as well this time. Also, I’m sure there are some ex-Drill Instructors among you that could share some pretty funny stories. If you’re willing to contribute stories (yes, more than one can be used) please include your date of enlistment, duty station (PI or SD) and your bootcamp picture if available.
Semper Fi
Jim Barber
USMC
March 6, 1958
Sgt Grit wants to hear from you! Leave your comments below or Submit your own Story !
MCRD 1968 one of my platoon mates when asked by drill instructor if every body got all their uniforms popped up saying the private did not get his dress slippers sir. rest of time in boot camp he was referred to as private Cinderella by all the di’s
Rober, send me the details of this story to bootcampstories4@gmail.com Jim Barber
It was around October-November, 1966 at 2nd Btln, PI and we had this recruit from Maine. Picture a Pillsbury doughboy white, average height, pudgy (like the doughboy), timid type of person (bordering on the shxt-bird end of the order) and the Drill Instructors decided to ‘work’ him some to toughen him up. So they started running him between the three of them (2 DIs on the second deck in an office and the other in the squadbay and one on the first deck in the ladder well); reporting to each and then getting chewed out and sent back to one of the others to report. This went on and on for quite a while, up the ladder wells, report, get chewed out and sent to another down the ladder well; until he was fully frustrated and about to collapse. At which point, the DI, calling him by name, yells “xxxxxx, when you leave here you’re either going to be a man or crazy, which is it going to be?” Here’s this recruit about to drop, falling apart mentally and somewhat physically, standing at attention and shouting in this high pitched, squeeky Maine accent “Ca-raazzyy, Sir”. Then the DIs lost it and went ballistic. He did graduate and after our graduation ceremony, here’s this same guy going all around the area, finding recruits and hard-assing them because he now had his EGA. Like ‘getting even’.
Recruit Training Depot Paris Island 1956 Platoon 63 Third Battalion. While on evening break and receiving a package from home, left the wrapper in the fire sand bucket next to my bunk. DI came in, saw what I did and stood me at attention while he poured the sand all over me and placed the bucket on my head. He then used his swagger stick and started hitting the bucket while still over my head and said in a commanding tone, I now christen you Sir Galahad for which I was left with during the remainder of my training along with some minor ear ringing.
Jim, send me the details please Jim Barber bootcampstories4@gmail.com
Ed, send me the details please Jim Barber bootcampstories4@gmail.com
My recolection is gonna be a little sketchy on tis but it has stuck in my mind for almost 50 years. Boot camp Sand Diego, 1969. we recieved an Army retread Spc5 from Kentucky, he was recycled from a previous platoon. During one of our rare free times in the new barracks, we started in the quanset huts, this Spc5 was napping, and one of the guys thought it would be funny to put shaving cream around his open mouth and then pulled out his dick and put some on the tip of it and then woke the Spc5 up. His reaction was so funny the whole squad bay erupted in uncontrollable laughter. We could even hear the Drill Instructors laughing in their office.
Fall of 1962, PI, Platoon 375 (God Bless Staff Sergeant Rivers). First couple of weeks we were still struggling to learn the new terminology: deck, head, ladder, bulkhead, etc. One recruit came out of the mess hall uncovered and the DI shouted “Maggot, where’s your cover?” The flustered kid answered “Sir, I left it in the chuck wagon!” Some of us snorted, the DI just shook his head and rolled his eyes.
Please re-send your stories to me at bootcampstories4@gmail.com.
In boot camp the DI was asking everyone what they did before boot camp. most were students, 2 were retreads finally he got around to the to the one who makes this story funny. ” Private, what did you do? Suh, I worked for PILGRIMS PRIDE. Well what did you do for Pilgrims pride? Suh, I killed chickens.” RhThe DI got red and choked back a laugh. From that day forward he was known as “Chicken Killer”
At Quantico as an officer “candidate” and after getting our heads shaved so we could start our Bulldog program.t, I found myself in a platoon of candidates with M-14’s on a nearby drill deck (parking area) in the Summer of 1972. Having been in Navy ROTC and also a military boys prep school, the standard drill moves were easy. However, after having somehow missed a simple left face command, our Platoon Sargent (DI) stopped everything and came charging over at me, screaming every four letter word in the dictionary. For some reason I visualized the TV personalities of Sargent Carter charging Gomer Pyle… and I let my face slightly smirk at the thought. The Gunny saw this and stopped in his tracks, paused, and then called me out of formation to start doing squat thrusts with my rifle in the mid-day heat and on the hot asphalt until I almost passed out. THEN for me boot camp started in earnest.
Boot Camp 1981 SD,,,Hygiene inspection right before we hit the rack one night. We would stand on our footlockers in our skivvies which were boxers, the DI would inspect that everybody was clean,etc,etc and then the last thing we would do was an about face and he would check our Achilles tendon to make sure it was not swollen or injured. That’s what was going on when Pvt Hansen did his about face. After he turned around the DI noticed he had put his skivvies on backwards and his lilly white butt was shining through the hole just about at face level with the DI. I cannot remember exactly what all was screamed at Hansen but his heterosexuality was seriously being questioned! I remember that was one of the few times as a platoon we lost our bearing with laughter and did not pay dearly for it!!!
Jim Barber needs to locate Sgt. Solmes. This guy was the meanest, scariest DI that ever walked the face of the earth. I,m sure he would have some great stories, like the time he put a tape recorder “ON” in our tent when he had run us back from the rifle range. He then called one of the recruits into the duty tent- did not say a word but just played the recording of the recruit saying bad things about him. He then dismissed the recruit telling him he would be dealt with later, leaving the recruit to contemplate his future.
Dan, any help you can give to locate the Sgt would be appreciated. Send your story to me at bootcampstories4@gmail.com
Had a member of my 3rd Battalion, Plt 3029, 1979, named Recruit Sacks. He reminded me a bit of “Sad Sacks” actually. We were at the rifle range, he was on the ready box to my right so he was clearly in my view. My SDI, SSgt Vickers walked up to him w/a small toad in his hand & I believe jokingly told him to “eat this f%*king toad Sacks. As fast as he said it, Sacks snatched the toad from his hand, put it in his mouth & started chewing. The look on my Audi’s face was classic disbelief. Needless to say, I couldn’t help snickering & did some time in “the pit. Like they drilled into our heads, “discipline is instant, willing, obedience to orders, Sir”. This was a clear example of it. I still chuckle to this day when I think of that day.
Claude, send me this story with your date of enlistment, duty station, platoon number and boot camp picture to bootcampstories4@gmail.com.
Boot Camp P.I. May 67. We had our week of Mess Duty A the W.M. mess hall. One day a W.M. D.I. marched her girls up to the front of the Hall, put them at ease. Then she called them to attention saying. When I say ATTENTION all I want to hear is 70 pussys sucking for air. We about died laughing. You probably won’t be able to print this one.
Dick, send me this story and include your date of enlistment, platoon number, duty station and boot camp picture to bootcampstories4@gmail.com
I went through OCS in the summer of 71. For reasons unknown to us lowly Candidates we were moved to a different barracks every day for the first four days. Each time you were assigned a different rack. On the third night in a new barracks we stood at attention in front of our racks as the Sergeant Instructor standing next to the light switch gave the commands Prepare to Mount, followed by Mount! The two Candidates at the rack next to the light switch both jumped into the bottom rack. Needless to say the Sergeant Instructor went ballistic questioning their sexual preferences and accused them of attempting to pull him into the rack with them. The rest of the platoon laid in our racks at attention but could not stifle our laughter and were allowed to get away with it. The two sexual offenders did bends and mothers for a long time and the fire watch was given specific instructions to check through out his 2 hour watch that they remained in their own rack and to pass it on their relief to do the same. The next day was our haircut day. We were standing at attention “rockets to sockets” lined up in front of the barber shop in Mainside Quantico. The two sexual offenders from the previous night were together in the line. The Sergeant Instructor saw this and again went nuts. He pulled the two of them out of the line and said if the were going to continue in their sexual perversion they will have to make it legal. On the steps of the barbershop he conducted a marriage ceremony complete with cigar bands for rings. He did not have them kiss to end the ceremony but did have them hold hands and skip together around the block yelling “We are married”. This time most of the rest of us realized that laughing in public would not be an option, those that did paid the price.
Gio, please send this story to me, including your name, date of enlistment, platoon number and duty station, to bootcampstories4@gmail.com. Thanks
Dan Miller Plt.3105, SD 1974. One night when we were participating in free time, two of our D.I.’s were in the duty hut when D.I. Sgt. Brundage walked in and started talking to them. All of a sudden I heard “Sir, Pvt. Miller, Eye eye Sir!. I dropped my boots and ran to the duty hut, pounded on the hatch and reported “Sir, Pvt. Miller reporting as ordered Sir”. The was a brief moment of silence from the D.I.’s until one of them yelled “Who’s that!” Again I reported in the appropriate manner. Then Sgt. Thymes yelled “Get in here!” I entered the duty hut and saw all three of the D.I.’s looking at me and asking me who ordered me to the duty hut. I replied “Sir, the private heard the guide call the privates name so the private reported to the duty hut, Sir!” Sgt. Thymes then ordered the guide into the duty hut and asked him what was going on. The guide told him “Sir, The guide heard Drill Instructor Sgt. Brundage say that he needed to get layed tonight so I called Pvt. Miller’s name!” The look on Sgt. Brundages face was priceless and Sgt.’s Thymes and Parrish executed a perfect about face and stood there and laughed silently but you could see them vibrating. Sgt. Thymes then did another about face and ordered me out of the duty hut. I don’t think anything happened to the guide but he did stay in there for a few minutes counting.
Daniel, please forward this story to me, including your date of enlistment and boot camp picture if you have it, to bootcampstories4@gmail.com.
BARBER HAVE YOU EVER SHAVED WITH A BUCKET OVER YOUR HEAD??? TRY IT. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO GET RID OF LICE ON YOUR BALLS? SHAVE ONE SIDE THEN SET THE OTHER SIDE ON FIRE AND STAB THEM WITH AN ICEPICK AS THEY FLEE. PRINT THAT. DO YOU KNOW WHATS LOWER THAN WHALE SHIT?? NOTHING BECAUSE IT’S ON THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN. PRINT THAT. IN MY 3YEARS 2 MONTHS AND 11 DAYS IN THE MARINES I NEVER SAW A WOMAN MARINE. I GUESS YOU WANT TO BE POLITICALLY CORRECT AND SELL MORE COPIES. LOVE TO HEAR THEIR STORYS. SEND THEM TO US WHEN YOU GET THEM VIA SGT GRIT. BYE THE WAY WHAT IS THE TITLES OF YOUR BOOKS??. THESE MARINES STORIES ARE GREAT. THANKS FOR THE LAUGHS MARINES. JIM JOIN THE MARINES AND YOU WILL GET YOUR OWN STORY TO PRINT.